About Me

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hmmm... i luv being myself... regardless of wat others think bout me... i am wat i am.. im not gonna change if peep ask me to... i only change if i want to as long it doesnt hurt anybody... n dats cool with me... so get to knw me... then judge me...

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Chapter 129: who like BUFFET?!

yeah last night was a very thoughtful night i presumed. my dearest friend gave me something to think about. a food for my thought i guess. and i understand 100% what is she trying to say. i get it seriously! but its hard. i mean like i dont want it to be like this but it suprisingly it did. i understand im not the victim but i didnt say dat im happy with it. it just a feeling that i cant resist. and i almost want to let it go. but i cant. damn. how should i put it in words?

but seriously, i am determine to change. change for the sake of that person. the special person in my life right now apart from my family. if i ever be a burden for you then im really sorry. i wont burden you anymore. i wont talk about my life as much as i would do after this. coz i dont want you to be apart of this whole conspiracy. enough of knowing things that most best friend would talk about.

i really appreciate your concern. you really care about us. and that is really cool! i love you!

Mr. syAEr_dEAn
p/s: "Always syg. Dh smpai g tau ai."SHE texted me that. SHE care about my wellbeing. how cool is that? love you A***T M***I...

Friday, January 29, 2010

Chapter 128: things getting better.

my dearest sony ericsson w910i broke so basically im not in the mood of writing down in my blog. me n HER is getting better. we started to date back. started from yesterday. we went to bukit bintang. i accompanied HER shopping.as always, girls take time as they went shopping. so does HER. my back hurt when i got home last night. but it all worthed! i miss to went out with HER again. i miss HER. how can im not loving HER. my heart melted when i saw HER.
from now on its all going to be about HER!
Mr. syAEr_dEAn
p/s: "Hee..superb!" SHE texted me. SHE got HER own "you're my love". huu~

Friday, January 15, 2010

Chapter 127 : IMPROVISATION!!

people change for better. sometimes for worse. but still it called change. me myself had changed through times. and sometimes i wonder if it is good or im just being another jackass for this world. probably when people said that you need to change the it mainly because you need a reality check. i've been always wanted to be someone else since i was a kid. its not like my life was bad, it just i wanna see and feel like others. feels like i was born again. feel to have a new attitude. a new and different persona. but yet i feel like there are always something that stoping me from being a new improvised human that carried the same name.

my friend once told me that he kinda sad when i start smoking. he said that im losing the "good boy" image. another friend of mine told me that im a good boy that only messed other people up when they messed myself up first. to be honest, what they said are partly true. i hate to get into other people business unless it related to me. hate to fight. hate to argue. i just hate to see people to have this kind of misunderstanding occured between them.

one thing for sure i will always try my best to make the people around me to feel inviting when they are around me. i will always try my best to accommodate other people needs. its hard to say NO when my friends ask for my help. hard to say NO when they ask me to lepak with them unless there are certain event that i cant dodge from. but i have to acomodate my needs first. i have to put myself on top of other people in order to accommodate others. and for what im seeing sometimes i did left some people out from my list. ask HER. SHE would know how ignorance i am sometimes towards the need of others.

so i'd changed. whats the big deal of that? im a BAD ASS guy who wanted to be part of the world but different in many sorts so that people will acknowledge by who i am not who i resemble like. but i know that this change somehow is bigger to swallow on but im confident that it will do just fine. unless i rily feel like i need to change again then o would gladly do it.

so people, dont give others a s**t. if you need to kill or eat other then just do it. because what is more important here that you are being yourself.

"dont change because you are forced to,change because that whats you heart tells you..."

Mr. syAEr_dEAn
p/s: "u r unpredictable...it changed my perception of u.." her text sounds like... hmmm....

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Chapter 126: new lock for me...


i always have this kind of phobia of having my hair cut since i had this traumatic experience at a saloon near my house. i love to have my hair in the of the expert so that my hair wont look like a mess so it wont make my face look fat. i've been told so many time my short haircut either da haircut looks bad or the haircut wud sumhow enlarge or enlighten the puffy cheek of mine. and there r people that told me my haircut looks good bcoz its short not bcoz i rily had this rily great haircut like my parents always said but deep in my lonely n soulful heart i felt bit frustrated due to bad haircut n stuff. i had this haircut back in july that so bad till i have to hide it with a fedora so no one will ever see me with that kind of hair.

there are rules for me to have a haircut. n the rules are;

a) no hairclipper- this tool will only make my hair sort of like da school kid's hair.

b) not too short- damn!! again no school kid's hair. SHE hate it..

c) no layer cut- love my hair to be fluffy.

d) no "ekor"- my neck will feel itchy as my hair get longer.

e) wash n cut is a must- nice!

f) no massage- last time i had it my neck hurt so bad!

g) no botak plzzz...

i like to have these sort of rules so dat i wont regret till i have to hide it as for da reminder for me in the future... last monday i got a haircut appointment at Hairkunst salon at The Curve.. considering that monday is Gent's day n da price will be deducted me n amin made a decision to cut our hair thre... its a lovely experince n da haircut is rily nice.. will be goin thre in da future... hee :D


Mr. syAEr_dEAn

p/s: "But..i ned u.." hmm.. :(

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Chapter 125: last weekend wanted!!

officially im here back in shah alam... n its lovely.. miss da air here.. da chaotic life.. da inhabitants... almost.. thres few facelifts given to shah alam.. n so far its nice.. SHE moving to live at a rent house... n hopefully it will help to enligthen our lives as holiday rily tiring both of us... so stil im wishing for da best like always..

enough of dat.. so being here in shah alam is like nurturing da wild side of me.. back at home, im a person wtih curvue but not anymore.. at least not now... n my parents getting more n more suspicious of their very wildest n most rebellious child in the family as my mum found few items dat r not nice to have or even look at.. 2 things dat mke me go "o ohh"... first my mum found da ashtray on my bookshelf n a blowed-up condom dat i got for free at a HIV campaign under my bed.. heee :D... i x knw wats happen back in melaka.. but i guess my parents is ssssoooo damn bengang n shocked to found such things.. huu~

anyway aside from my parents discovery dat can slowly resembles me as wat person i am now which is bit of curiosity plus naughtiness n a pinch of cockiness, i had a blast for 4 days str8!


woke up as early as i cud.. the nite b4 i slept at 4a.m.. me n my fren went to karaoke-iing at Quality hotel for an hour.. honestly i felt rily intimidated when i sang with my fren... malu!! n later on we went to sunway as i wanted to find an outfit for amin's Bday bash.. da theme was red n white.. havent found 1.. so like around 6p.m amin basit n hafiz arrived at train station n i fetched them... we went out to bkit bintang dat nite n to clebrate new year... amin, hafiz, jimmy n hafiz n me were thre n da rest was history...

cupcake chic indeed!!

us heralding new year!!


i fetched ucop at LCCT near sepang... n on our way my tyre is punctured... damnit!! called my uncle n he came to da rescue... so after fetched ucop my car broke down at KM36 elite highway near da KLIA exit.. damn!! we stucked thre for 5 hours.. from 7.30p.m till 12.30a.m.. my family were thre to help me.. but my dad was ssooo pissed off he didnteven go out from the car till the tow truck was thre.. me n my dad didnt talk da whole day... hee~

CLK was injured!!

look how busy they r...


da nite before were spent at my bro's.. we went to da workshop n i got my deraest CLK fixed.. n da total cost for it is RM493.25.. n i had da receipt with me to remind me wat a huge amount was dat.. huu~ anyway later dat evening, me basit ucop n amin went to bukit bintang to have a soping spree since it was da last 2 days of Y.E.S.. n we went lepak-ing at pelita klcc till 3a.m n got home later on...

philosophy men shirt...

zara's high top sneakers

zara's blue sneakers..


woke up kinda early considering the time i shut my eyes off... off me n basit went to da faculty to check on da freshies.. then we went to pavilion to meet amin, fia, azard n jimmy thre.. sent basit to UPM.. back to shah alam.. delivered marshmallow to my fren n climbed da stairs to heaven(my house)...

from left: basit, me, jimmy n amin...

my GUESS man clutch!

Mr. syAEr_dEAn
p/s: "Npe lmbt sgt ni. Drive safely." SHE texted me this... how caring... but stil one DOT at the end of each word.. hmmm...